Even the most humane of mousetraps is still a trap. In life, beliefs can hold you in a place you do not want to be. The theory may make sense when you think about your past experiences with others, it can even make sense when you think of the needs of others without yours, but a belief that is a trap seldom makes sense when it keeps you from enjoying life. Instead of building a better mousetrap, let’s see how to eliminate the trap.
Practice: See your life as it currently exists holding this trap, this belief.
Identify: In what ways do you:
- tell yourself no
- control your behavior or the behavior of others
- adapt to fit the expectation of the external belief
- lie or withhold information
- conform to avoid confrontation or pain
- lack trust or freedom
Feelings and Emotions: How does this uneasiness present itself during your participation in this belief? What comes up each time you find yourself trapped within this cage? Take your time and pay close attention at the moment you are stuck and actively participating in this belief. Seeing it at the moment it occurs is an essential step to creating space between you and the experience so you can see your participation.
The Begining: At the moment you are in the belief you may have some insight as to where discomfort stems. Jot down notes or tell someone so these ideas do not slip back down into your subconscious. Later, after you are out of the uneasiness, you can contemplate how the trap began for you. Question yourself:
- How did this experience begin with love? Make an effort to see how the control started from a place of love either in you or someone else.
- Why did you decide to continue this trap?
- What safety does this trap give you?
The Middle: Here is where you will look toward understanding your situation. Truly, think outside the trap for this part:
- What would your life look like without this trap?
- What freedoms would you explore?
- If there were no perceived consequences what would you do differently?
Allow yourself to expand and visualize your answers for this section. What makes change possible is a clear understanding of how this can look. If you use fear to block that understanding, you won’t be able to create. Open up here to all things as possible. Later, when creating the win-win you can figure out the minute details, here you only need to see possibilities, not know the solution.
The End: Now, move your experience into your current understanding that you have created through questioning.
- Does it serve your current need to continue this trap?
- Can you see a path with your new knowledge that would let you live your life without this trap?
- Are you aware of the steps that would allow for a win-win in this situation?
If you can get to the win-win (you may need time for contemplation or more support to understand this option), you can make the free will choice to let go of this trap permanently. This experience could be the last time you are stuck in this belief.
Purpose: This is a conceptual process which can expand over several days and weeks. You are breaking the hold of old beliefs and how they impact your ability to think. Quantumly, you still exist in the box until the box itself is no more. Spend as much time as you need to not only exit the trap but demolish it.